She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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