Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Me too!
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize