I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
