Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
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