Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
