I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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