Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize