I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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