me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Randomize