he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
