I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
