We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
