I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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