awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
vagina is talking i cant
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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