The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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