week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
