Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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