Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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