all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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