Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??

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(248) i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem?? http://tfl.nu/bwq7

Replies (14) Good night (3675) Bad night (1132)
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(408): View more from California

Where is the hickey?

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(408): Where is the hickey? http://tfl.nu/scjm

Replies (4) Good night (1093) Bad night (500)
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(248): View more from Michigan

So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in

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(248): So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in http://tfl.nu/mvwo

Replies (15) Good night (7066) Bad night (1081)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?

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(412): seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party? http://tfl.nu/4j0b

Replies (7) Good night (4333) Bad night (1354)
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(516): View more from New York

making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"

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(516): making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage" http://tfl.nu/jy1p

Replies (9) Good night (4840) Bad night (959)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express

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(479): there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express http://tfl.nu/hlsi

Replies (3) Good night (3238) Bad night (936)
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(425): View more from Washington

Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!

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(425): Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue! http://tfl.nu/4b94

Replies (14) Good night (3115) Bad night (1063)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree

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(215): i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree http://tfl.nu/vm1y

Replies (2) Good night (1580) Bad night (925)
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(309): View more from Illinois

remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..

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(309): remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him.. http://tfl.nu/o0zu

Replies (13) Good night (1377) Bad night (2266)
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(979): View more from Texas

We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.

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(979): We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing. http://tfl.nu/hvhg

Replies (9) Good night (2238) Bad night (803)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.

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(919): Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face. http://tfl.nu/tvg8

Replies (1) Good night (949) Bad night (520)
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(616): View more from Michigan

Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?

(1-616): View more from Michigan

I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.

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(616): Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries? (1-616): I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex. http://tfl.nu/oahp

Replies (5) Good night (1003) Bad night (327)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.

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(203): They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex. http://tfl.nu/k0sh

Replies (3) Good night (698) Bad night (467)
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(858): View more from California

Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip

(858): View more from California

It's the little things

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(858): Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip (858): It's the little things http://tfl.nu/9b0s

Replies (0) Good night (498) Bad night (267)
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(506): View more from New Brunswick

We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.

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(506): We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true. http://tfl.nu/0lim

Replies (0) Good night (348) Bad night (185)

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