when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.