i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
