And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
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as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
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I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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