Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize
