There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
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Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
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He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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