I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
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