Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
