Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
