is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
