apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Who died my cat blue again?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
