I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Sacagawea was the original milf.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
No I am not eating basil off your cock
God gave him joint rollers for hands
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
40s are totally the cure
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
