Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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