there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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