I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
