So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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