Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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