I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
