ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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