She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize