Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
