I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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