BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
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My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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