i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
