just come out here and I will go home with you...
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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