If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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