I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
