Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
