i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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