When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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