That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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