Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
