We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
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