Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize